Easter on the Clarence

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EASTER ON THE CLARENCE Claire Silcock "Draw stroke right". "backpaddle" came the plaintive cry from the rear of the Canadian canoe. A large rock suddenly appeared before us and as I frantically tried to do my bit to manoeuvre the "Green Peril" around this obstacle, I was unceremoniously struck in the chest by a monstrous bow-wave and left gasping to regain my breath!! The beautiful Clarence River was the location for this drama at Easter '92 when a group of eight people rounded up from various places by Rex, set off for 5 days paddling on the river in a mixture of Canadian canoes and Dancer kayaks. When Rex first mentioned the trip to me it appealed immediately since it was something I had wanted to do for some time, and I was reluctant to let the opportunity slip by lest it be gone for good!! Despite a distinct absence of paddling skills on my part, there was no containing the enthusiasm and I soon found myself grovelling to my manager for permission to have the Thursday before Easter off work. The lights of Picton faded behind us as we sped The next few weeks slipped by in a blur until a week southwards, stopping briefly at Blenheim to uplift our before we were to leave when Rex suggested that a crash second shuttle driver. Some confusion about the location course on the fundamental and most critical points of of the campsite just out of Kaikoura delayed hitting the paddling a Canadian might be in order. Armed with the sack until 2am but the moon was full and bright as we necessary equipment we launched the canoe on the Petone rigged the tent-fly between the two vehicles and settled in foreshore one wild, Wednesday evening and Rex took me for a few hours kip, rocked gently to sleep by Rex's through the finer points of handling a Canadian. Draw impersonation of a diesel locomotive! strokes, sweep strokes and just plain forward paddle strokes all left an indelible mark on my mind and I A glorious, clear morning beckoned us from the festering couldn't wait for the next week to pass until we would be depths of our sleeping bags and after a hearty breakfast at on our way. a roadside cafe we blasted south to Hanmer Springs for an ice-cream stop before heading over Jack's Pass and Wednesday arrived and due to bubbling enthusiasm, down the valley to the put-in point on the Clarence work was all but a write-off sO a sympathetic manager River. Lunch in the sun saw valiant attempts to devour sent his exuberant subordinate staff member home early the edible contents of my gear in order for it to fit into to finish packing. Gear lists and contents spread from one the barrel kindly provided by Pete. With a great deal of end of my bedroom to the other gave it the resemblance squashing and pummelling I managed to fit everything in of a fall-out zone, but before long a degree of and after squeezing into my 7mm wetsuit and organisation became more apparent and I walked out the commenting that it appeared to have shrunk, I was ready door wondering what I had forgotten. to do battle with the river. Considerable creativity was required to pack and load the At this point a bemused Rex was heard to utter several cars but eventually we were trundling off down the unprintable expletives as the realisation that he had motorway to the Ferry Terminal, attracting peculiar locked the keys in the boot of his car dawned on him! stares along the way. Once aboard the ferry we ensconced The next 10 minutes saw us standing around in ourselves in the cafeteria/bar, engaged in some serious amusement while Malcolm crawled, wriggled and carbohydrate loading in the form of a sizeable helping of squirmed his way behind the back seat in an endeavour to fish-n-chips, and settled down for an uneventful crossing. reach the elusive keys. After a minor deviation for a team photo in front of the "Hotel Clarence" and to check out scratching, discussion and a test run by Rex, who the Acheron Accommodation House, we headed for the declared it manageable, Pete and Trieve stepped forward canoes and the start of 5 days on the river. as guinea pigs to give "the Chute" the berries!!! Into the boats and after a few tentative strokes we were To jovial bidings of farewell, and it was nice to know soon gliding off down the river looking out anxiously for you, Pete and Trieve wandered back to the canoes and the first rapid. My canoe-mate Barry, refreshed my prepared to take on "the Chute", while the rest of us memory with a run-down of the more important paddle observed from the rocks above. They sailed on through strokes and we settled into a relaxed rhythm, admiring making it look so easy that Barry and I, not to be the scenery and enjoying the peace and tranquillity of the outdone, stepped forward eagerly for our chance to shine. river. With furious backpaddling in the front and skilful manoeuvring in the rear, the "Green Peril" thundered like Rex and Malcolm had opted to paddle the river in an awkward, fat pig through "the Chute"!! A plastered-on Dancers sO they steamed off ahead as probes to determine smile cleverly disguised my blind terror as the bow was the safest route for the three Canadian canoes paddled by engulfed in a mighty wave that thudded into my chest and Pete and Trieve, Paul and Gary, and Barry and I. Barry threatened to dislodge the paddle gripped tightly in my and Malcolm took great delight in describing the only white-knuckled fists. Barry's commands to draw stroke serious rapid we would encounter that day and we right and backpaddle were barely audible over the roar of paddled on down the river with some trepidation. With the water and I was relieved to glide into shallower, the prospect of "the Chute" looming mysteriously ahead, calmer water and leap ashore as our canoe slowly the crews concentrated on gaining some degree of control swamped! and expertise in the rapids. Rex teamed up with Gary to take the third canoe through A few well-placed and desperate strokes enabled us to "the Chute" and I was secretly pleased to catch a glimpse avoid the odd collision with rocks (and other boats) and of a rather grim-faced Gary fending off massive bowdespite the river being somewhat lower than normal, we waves with his chest. Pete couldn't disguise his obvious made steady progress. Barry and I developed an relief that the Canadians had come through the first major understanding of command-and-obey team dynamics and obstacle unscathed! several catastrophes were narrowly averted. A short distance down the river Gary and Paul spotted Late in the afternoon we beached the canoes upstream of several pigs grazing unconcernedly on the riverbank. "the Chute" and scrambled over the rocks and boulders to Images of bacon for breakfast faded as the pigs strolled take a closer look at our objective. "The Chute" looked off out of reach of "the great smoking stick". gravely ominous but the tempting piking noises were catching in my throat as the others declared their Our first campsite was soon reached and before long tent enthusiasm. After some quiet deliberation, head- flies were up, a fire lit and dinner underway. The moon Claire Silcock rose, a wonderful full and bright yellow ball, casting gazed around, taking in the picturesque scenery that lay ethereal shadows around as Rex laid out some bait for an before us. unsuspecting eel. One crew in particular seemed hell-bent on providing the A couple of rifle shots announced the new day and I entertainment for the other troops by engaging in quite rubbed my eyes in initial confusion until I realised that it spectacular submarine impersonations! They were was just Paul, a safe distance up the river sighting in his frequently spotted bailing furiously or sitting waist-deep rifle in preparation for an attempt to add pork to the in water. During one especially challenging section of dinner menu. Struggling and wriggling my way into my white-water they actually managed to roll the boat frosty wet-suit brought a few gasps but the discomfort completely and swam the length of the rapid with grins didn't last long and we were soon pushing off from the from ear to ear. Barry and I would try to paddle the beach and gliding quietly down the river doing a few rapids ahead of the "white submarine" team in order to warm-up strokes as we went. Magnificent views of the get into a good position to capture the action on film; we Inland Kaikouras unfolded as we cruised along in the were seldom disappointed. morning sun and we kept a vigilant look out for any little fat pigs. A munch stop on a stoney beach heralded a I found it all highly amusing until I realised that due to a change of tactics for the crew of the "Green Peril". Barry slight mix-up one morning my gear barrel had insisted that it would be ideal for my personal inadvertently found its way on to their boat and as I development if I took a turn in the rear of the canoe SO I discovered later on, the lid wasn't done up tightly enough apprehensively took up my position and for the next and some of the gear in the top of the barrel got a bit of a couple of hours the "Green Peril" weaved, zig-zagged dunking! Not to worry though; everything dried off and criss-crossed its way down the river forwards, nicely in front of the roaring inferno that evening. backwards and at times, sideways. A couple of little fat pigs with "dinner" written all over A crash course in J-strokes eased the situation slightly but them were spotted grazing on the riverbank and Gary I was pleased when a suitable lunch site was spotted. steered the canoe towards the shore while Paul extracted With the MSR cranked up for a brew we lay back in the his rifle from the centre consul and lined them up for a grass soaking up the UV's and listening to some tales couple of shots. Our pork dinner disappeared over the from Rex.... "Tell us a story, Rex... "!! ridge at a spritely trot! Rex mumbled something about how he could do with a little something to supplement Summoned back to reality by an RNZAF jet conducting a the evening meal which was looking particularly meagre low-level fly-by up the valley in search of an invisible at this point, so all eyes were cast landwards in search of foe (according to Rex), we scoffed the last crumbs of more pork. An offering in the shape of an old billy goat lunch and headed reluctantly back to the boats. To my was soon spotted and Paul took careful aim and did the well-concealed disappointment we resumed our pre-lunch deed, ensuring that we wouldn' 't go to bed with rumbling positions for the afternoon paddle, but after a couple of tums! desperate and harried manoeuvres in the next rapids Barry agreed that it could be pertinent to revert to the We camped that night a few bends upriver of the original set-up!! The ever-changing scenery and the infamous "Jawbreaker", preferring to face it fresh in the glorious oranges of the autumn poplars filled our view as morning. Paul, Rex and I set off for a spot of bunny- I settled back into the rhythm of draw strokes and sweep hunting hoping to catch a glimpse of the Easter bunny but strokes and left the steering to Barry. alas, we were the only bunnies to be seen.. creeping around in the gathering dusk!! Another pleasant campsite was located and Rex kept us amused after dinner with several impressive wax bombs. Billy Goat marinated in red wine!! Once I managed to The temperature dropped overnight and we awoke in the erase from my mind the image of the poor B.G. tumbling morning to a fresh dusting of snow on the Inland down the cliff, I actually had to agree that it didn't taste Kaikouras. It's a special moment to wake in the chilly too bad a little tough and chewy, but edible nonetheless! dawn to the sound of a crackling fire and the knowledge that a steaming hot cup of milo was but a few steps away. Easter Sunday dawned fine and warm and we set off Gary and Paul were up before a sparrow's "cough" each down the river in search of the "Jawbreaker"! We pulled morning and by the time most of us had extracted the boats ashore a short distance upstream and gathered ourselves from our cosy pits they had a roaring fire ready on the rock to survey the best route. It all looked pretty for us. dodgy to me, but not wanting to be labelled a whimp I took up my position in the front of the canoe, slapped a A leisurely breakfast and a new and novel method of brave look on my face and obeyed the urgent commands culling rabbits patented by Rex, saw some frantic packing from Barry to backpaddle, draw stroke left, draw stroke before heading for the boats for yet another relaxing day right and backpaddle again. Several decent-sized waves on the river. We cruised for the first 10 or 15 minutes, hit me in the chest and face and for a while I thought we stretching and warming up the various muscles that I were sure to sink, but once through the worst of it we never knew I had, then we settled into the rhythm and paddled frantically for the shore and stepped out of the canoe just as the water lapped the rail.

Pete and Gary decided to show off their skills and in an considerably and the rapids were less frequent so a war attempt to impress us they ended up going down the was inevitable. At one point Paul and Gary pulled whole "Jawbreaker" backwards!! Once was not enough alongside in the "White Torpedo" and with a mischievous for Rex and Malcolm who stayed around to paddle it grin whispered to me to climb into their boat, leaving several times. Paul and Gary continued to entertain us Barry alone in the front of the "Green Peril" to paddle as with their antics in the rapids, and Barry and I just best he could. He was coping quite adequately until he managed to avoid taking a swim on several occasions. A got a bit over-confident and fell over the side at which welcome fire at lunchtime restored the circulation to point Rex decided to stir things up somewhat and give some very cold extremities and it was hard to drag him a helping hand! ourselves back to the boats for another few hours on the river. The rest of the day cruised by with a few more The result was war! Rex attempted to stage a Boarding dunkings and several minor collisions with rocks when Party which resulted in our boat taking on a considerable the concentration began to wane. The scenery began to amount of water. Paul and I bailed furiously while Gary change as we got further down the river and became quite paddled us clear of the offending paddle-splashes. We gorgy in places The pools became longer with less were running very low in the water at times with three exciting rapids and consequently more paddling and less people and copious amounts of water on board but we lounging was required. managed to stay afloat.. .just.. .and we even got a chance to extract a little revenge!! We set up our last campsite on Matai Flats and soon had a roaring fire going and dinner underway. Rex adopted a Rex had tied his Dancer to the rear of the "Green Peril" novel method of chopping up our marshmallow Easter sO as we pulled alongside we flipped it over and held it under until it filled with water, considerably slowing down their progress and allowing us to paddle away to sit and laugh from a safe distance. Rex and Barry emptied the Dancer and paddled towards us offering a truce but we were immediately suspicious and justifiably so too. As soon as they were within striking range they bombarded us with container loads of water and massive paddle-splashes!! Our attention was turned to the third Canadian, paddled by Pete and Trieve, which had come thus far unscathed and war was declared. We found their submarine impersonation highly amusing and the battle continued as we made our way down the final stretches Claire Silcock of river to the road bridge, a short distance from the coast. The final eggs by using an axe... very innovative!! He was quite series of roller-coaster rapids provided some laughs as we accurate actually, and equal halves were passed around. were hit by one massive wave after another and Barry and MacCheese filled some empty spaces and we sat around I managed to swamp or semi-swamp a couple of times. the fire chatting till late and admiring the full moon. Rex glided past in his Dancer and I jumped on behind Despite a very heavy frost Malcolm still slept out beside him and rode the last few rapids sitting on the back of his the firel but he didn't look too happy in the morning when kayak, leaving Barry to carefully manoeuvre his way he had to chip the ice off his Everest in order to get it in through. the stuff-sack!! All too soon the road bridge came into view and five There was general lack of enthusiasm to pack up as our magic days on the beautiful Clarence River drew to a campsite remained out of range of the warming rays of close. Our pick-up vehicles were there waiting for us so the early morning sun. Frozen wetsuits were laid out in after a wash in the river and some more creative caran attempt to thaw them out and make them easier to loading, we were speeding our way towards Picton and a squeeze into. Mid-morning saw us finally heading for the feed of fish-n-chips before boarding the ferry before the boats and setting off down the river in glorious sunny final leg of a wonderful Easter trip!!! conditions. The pace. had dropped drastically from that of the previous four days indicating a serious reluctance by The team: Rex Benbrook, Paul Driscoll, Pete Bristow, the crews to reach the end of what had been a wonderful Malcolm Woods, Gary Goldsworthy, Barry Warnes, 5 days on the river!! The river had broadened Trieve McCarthy and Claire Silcock.